Saturday, April 11, 2009

Lessons Learned In Dating

I have been thinking a lot about my girlfriend these past few days. I think she is a tremendous woman of God and I am glad that the lord has placed her in my life. She keeps me smiling and she really has a lot of wisdom about her.

One of the things I like most about Andrea, is the fact that her and I try to be on the same page every time. Our communication isn't a 10, but we're working towards perfection. I personally believe that a key to any healthy relationship be it marriage, business or causal, is a (strong communication bond). Without it you're headed for trouble. Open communication helps you see what the other person feels. Whether you agree with their stance or not, you at least know where they are coming from. Another interesting key is that of (honesty). Communication and honesty go hand in hand like: peanut butter and jelly; salt and pepper; Fred and Ginger...If your communication isn't honest with the other person, then are you truly committed to that person at all? Are you willing to grow with that person and strive for a strong and healthy connection?

Over the years, I have learned that I am not the greatest communicator. I am a pretty good listener, but when it comes to actually sharing my feelings, I fail miserably. This is something that I am desiring to work on because I want to be able to share with her how I feel and why. Maybe there is something that is bothering me and yet, how can she know how to help me if I'm not opening up to her? Or place the shoe on the other foot, how can she open up to me if she's not sure how I would react to that particular situation?

Before you ever even think about the possibility of marriage, take into consideration how well you and your significant other communicate about issues; both the normal issues and the touchy ones, those issues that can make or break your life together.

Before I forget to, let's talk about listening...How well do you listen to what your signif other has to say? Would you say that you hear them; or would you say that you really hear them and can understand where they are coming from? So many times, I have seen couples fight and argue over stupid stuff simply because of a misunderstanding. Either the one didn't communicate their point well or the other just didn't properly hear and assimilate what was said. If you don't understand what the other is saying, ask for clarification. Ask them to tell you what they mean and why. Ask them to help you understand their heart and where they are and why.

Am I saying that this is easy? Not in any way, but as you learn to communicate, be honest with one another and hear what they are really saying; you too can have a great life together. These three keys are not the total lessons of what I learned, but they have helped me to become a better listener, hearer and Man.. More importantly they have helped me to love her the way Christ loves me.

Blessings,

Josh

1 comment:

Quebedeaux said...

great post!!! That is one thing that J and I are good at... we do have times where we don't communicate all that great, but then we seem to find our way back.