Those of you who know me, may see me as being very outgoing and sociable; but it wasn't always that way. I am very shy by nature and chose,
Words are very powerful in the arena of life. They can make or break you. Bring life or destroy life. I have always wanted the sense of belonging to something or someone. I mean, wanting to feel like I'm a part of something.
I can remember kids my own age at Bible School and how they acted, I sorta wondered why they were even there. Was it mommy and daddy that sent them? Was it the Lord? I hate to judge and this rant sounds like I am, but the call of God is a serious thing and that call carries with it a heavy responsibility. God is love!! God lives in us!! Love(God) is in us!!.........Without love, we are nothing but a bunch of noise.
Anyways, I came back to Rhema for my second year a different person. I came determined that I was going to be a friend, an ally, someone that could be trusted. After seeing how people acted, I wanted God to shine in me. I wanted His love to radiate from me to others. Slowly, my shyness started to melt.
Really, it took the combined effort of many people to bring out the best in me. They took me out of my comfort zone and taught me how to be the man of God I am today. I am by no means perfect, just crowned with dignity and worth. Just blessed and highly favored.
Second year at Rhema was a blast. I entered into it knowing what I was to do which was to be an Evangelist. How bout that, a shy kid called to Evangelize? School was easy for me because I was determined to learn all I could and put it into practice.
I was in the Evangelist group and not long after registration, God began to stoke the fire. I was sold out on God and I was ready to begin the path He had for me. As I mentioned previously, I got to know many well-known ministers and something I would do would do is when I had the chance, I'd ask questions. Questions about their call, how they prepare to minister, things like that. I wanted to know what I was getting into.
Something that has stuck with me is what Rod Parsley shared. I asked him, "What do you do the day your to preach? How do you prepare?" His answer rang in me and has brought many victories in my life. He said, "I get alone and just fellowship with my Father." It's that personal fellowship with Father God that will calm any internal storm and release that burden-removing, yoke-destroying power that abides in you.
Something I did regularly was to go to Rhema's park at night just to pray. I'd walk around the entire campus praying either in English or Tongues just to quiet my mind and get revelation. What I'm doing now was prayed out during those walks and things I haven't even entered into was prayed there as well. I called this my Gethsemane experience because it was just me and the Lord, no-one else.
During Second year I made it a priority to get to know the some of the First year students, just to prepare them for what to expect and to help out if needed. One instance that comes to mind is when my neighbor was having problems with his roommate. They lived in a 1/1 (one bedroom/one bath) apartment. Those things offered no privacy and so there was bound to be some problems. I know because I faced that two times. My first roommate kicked me out because I wasn't into the party scene and just having fun I was there to learn, not party. Second roommate fought with me constantly. Come to find out from his friends that he was jealous of me for some reason and just wanted to put me down. This happened during First year so by the time I came back to Second year I had my own place.
Getting back to my neighbor, he came by and asked how to get a stain out of the carpet and so I offered to show him how. When I walked into his apartment, the place was a disaster zone. It was a pig sty and there was food crumbs all over the place, not to mention it looked like 2 pack rats lived there. I asked him about this and that's when he mentioned about having roommate issues.
I shared with him about some of my experiences and advised him to talk to the roommate and settle the matter peacefully. Well that didn't work out too well and after having a meeting with the head of student housing, he was told that he could evict his roommate. The roommate was allowed to stay until the end of the school year. There is more to this, but I'd rather keep you guessing.
Also, because of my love for sports, I made it a priority to attend every home basketball game and travel to some of the away games. B-ball was a lot of fun and I got to spend it with a great friend who I keep in touch with to this day. Really, there was a girl on the team that I liked, but didn't have a chance with. I probably did, but no worries. It's all in the past.
The games brought great stories for me to use when I preach. Some stories have never been told because of things that took place. Plus I don't want to embarrass anybody.
Second year went by fast and so I accomplished a lot in just those nine months. I came out of my shell, made friends, did great in school and accomplished many other things by the grace of God.
I graduated May 18, 2002 with a 3.95gpa which for me was great. I was a C- student in High School. I left Rhema the following morning and never looked back. I miss Rhema to this day and look forward to the day when I can travel to my Spiritual home.
What do I miss most about Rhema, you may ask?
1. That strong corporate anointing
2. The love that permiated the campus
3. Exaltation (Tuesday morn prayer service w/ Miss Lynette Hagin)
4. Hearing Pastor Hagin Preach
5. Mom and Dad Hagin who both went home to be with the Lord
6. Friendships I made.
7. Zio's and China Star Buffet
This list isn't half of what I miss nor is it in any particular order. Rhema molded me into a man with an unshakable confidence in God and it developed a confidence in me that I can do anything with the Lords help.
Well, that about wraps up the story of my calling. I didn't do it justice by sharing all the details or share about what is happening with me to day; but if you just sit tight, maybe I will share with you some of what is happening in my life today.
Love ya,
Josh- Mark 9:23
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